Okay..yeah; so I’ve dropped the ball on this blog thing again. It wasn’t even on my radar until I got two new followers. Whoot, that seemed to be incentive enough to get me writing again. The thing is, well actually, the things are…one, I HAVE been running so, I haven’t completely dropped the ball but two, I got to thinking about this blog and I started to realize that my commitment to writing has a direct correlation with my commitment to running. I know, right? What a miraculous discovery. I’m a gawddamed genius..but seriously, like why is that? Maybe I’m in my head too much but like why can’t I be one of those militant runners who puts their whole heart and soul into running? Or, at least why can’t I just show up more than once a week? I just don’t get it. It’s like I can never be “all in” with anything I do. Yeah, yeah..I’ve got a crazy ass schedule…got a lot of commitments and responsibilities, but so do most people and they seem to be able to stick to it. And by “it,” I mean anything that requires some sort of commitment or dedication.
My coach always gives me an earful when I’ve fallen off the wagon and his rant always ends in…”you know running is all about what you put into it.” YES, I know! I know, I know I know. I also know that eating a bag of potato chips chased by 6 Bass Ales is going to make me fat, but I still do it. UGH! I’m my own worst enemy. Like, as I think about this, I keep thinking about this kid I know (no names to protect the lazy) who once said in response to being asked “why don’t you just do your homework?” And, he said, “cuz if I just don’t do it and get a bad grade, I can blame my bad grade on not doing it..but if I do it and still get a bad grade..then maybe the reason for the bad grade is because I’m stupid. “ Hmmmmm, something to think about.
Since my last blog entry, I got wicked sick. I couldn’t run any of the longer races that I was signed up for but I did run two 5ks. I got TERRIBLE times…I think the worst in my whole 25 years of running. So, my fear of being “stupid” has been realized. Good news now, there’s only one way to go from here. I’m in the lottery for the Cherry Blossom 10 Miler and I’m toying with the idea of running the DC Marathon with a friend of mine who just moved back to the area. The nice thing about reaching rock bottom is the fear of reaching rock bottom is no longer there. My new motto is to be more like the “Dude” not only with running but with my life in general. If you don’t get the “Dude” reference…it’s alluding to the movie, The Big Lebowski. Check it out! Well worth the watch.
Till next time my nuggets…keep on keep’n on.